Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Beach Bum Blonde Ale




So it's summer, and Anheuser-Busch seems like foisting more crap on us. I didn't think their Widmer stuff was too bad, so on my last trip to the local Albertson's I discovered the Beach Bum Blonde Ale. It had some douchebag looking surfer dude on it, and that should have been my first clue. At least it wasn't Landshark, Jimmy Buffett's beer. That smells like weed as soon as you open the bottle.

I didn't have high hopes while buying this, but I was semi-surprised. It wasn't as disgusting as I imagined, while still staying true to the crappiness of a lot of Anheuser-Busch stuff.

Taste: 5/10
Tastes like a weak american ale, nothing to write home about, but nothing too terribly bad either. Slight hint of citrus-y type stuff, like it poured a shot's worth of Sunset Wheat in the bottle while in the manufacturing plant, but all covered by crap. I was expecting pisswater, so it was a nice change from the normal rotgut I subject myself to on a regular basis.

Aroma: 5/10
Smelled like a skunky Shiner Helles Lager for some reason.

Price: 5/10
An actual ale-type beer for 6.49 a sixer at the grocery store. It's not like they sell ales for cheaper than that normally, so no real complaints there. I'm not going to give it a better score because that's still more than I normally pay for beer.

Hangover: 8/10
I had four of these fuckers, and I almost threw up the next day. That doesn't happen very often, much less after pounding some club sodas and eating before going to bed. Either what I had was laced with E. Coli, or this is not a beer to be trifled with in large quantities. Again, I didn't expect this kind of stuff from a blonde ale, it's not supposed to be punishing. Fucking liars.

This seems to just be a seasonal beer, and I don't expect it to come back out next year, I know I won't miss it any. It's worth a one-time try if you're the adventurous type to see if you really like feeling like you got kicked in the gut the next morning. Good for you if you are. I'm going back to drinking beer I know is shitty.

2 comments:

Matt said...

Someone told me to check out Land Shark and I picked it up at the store, saw it had something to do with Jimmy Buffet and immediately lost respect for the person who recommended it.

Anonymous said...

Great review...I get angry everytime I see this beer at the grocery store. Its high concentration of pure adouchebaggery cannot be overstated.